I'm Not Squeezing

Okay, little drop. It stings, then it's numb. Then I check your pressure.

Yellow drop, sting drop, numb drop, blink
Fluorescein on his cheek like highlighter ink
Chin on the rest and the blue light's glowing
Tiny little prism and his nerves start going
"Look straight ahead," and he stares at the ceiling
Look at my ear, sir, I know what you're feeling
I lean in close and the lids slam shut
Like a vault at the bank, and I'm locked out, what?

Don't squeeze, don't squeeze
Open nice and wide, please
Don't squeeze, don't squeeze
"I'M NOT SQUEEZING!"

I'm not squeezing (you're squeezing)
I'm not squeezing (you're squeezing)
Eyelids tighter than a pickle jar lid
I'm not squeezing (you're totally squeezing)
Squeeze that hard and it reads like fifty

I hold the lid gently, he reverses the chair
Rolls back to the wall, now he's halfway there
"Is this the puff one?" No sir, it's the blue
"Is it gonna touch me?" A little, it's true
It's light as a feather, you won't feel a thing
He's gripping the armrests like a roller-coaster swing
Two little half-moons line up and kiss
Twenty-one! Wait, he blinked. Okay, try this.

Don't squeeze, don't squeeze
Open nice and wide, please
Don't squeeze, don't squeeze
"I'M NOT SQUEEZING!"

Breathe in... breathe out...
Think of a beach... think of a breeze...
(Not that breeze. That's the puff machine.)
Eyes wide... eyes wide...
Got it. Fourteen. Beautiful.

I'm not squeezing (you're squeezing)
I'm not squeezing (you're squeezing)
Eyelids tighter than a pickle jar lid
I'm not squeezing (you're totally squeezing)
Squeeze that hard and it reads like fifty

"Great. Other eye."
"...I'm not squeezing."